The Call
by eragon456
Summary: Bella Baggins and her brothers, Bilbo and Bungo Jr., are just three below average height, not-so-law-abiding individuals trying to survive in the year 2020, until a mysterious book given by a family friend sends them straight into a fantasy land. Now on a quest to help an annoying Dwarf king reclaim his mountain, Bella must avoid angry orcs and prissy elves. ThorinXfem!Bilbo
1. Chapter 1

Hey, Sup! Eragon456 coming to you with my first story in a while. Hobbit Fiction. Hella. Anyways, I fixed a problem with my settings, so now I can actually publish fan fiction. Exciting, isn't it? Read and enjoy.

I own nothing. If it was, I certainly wouldn't be doing this.

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Bella hated gunfire.

Not only was it loud and annoying, but it hurt people, too.

Now, anyone would tell you that Bella and her two older brothers, Bilbo and Bungo Jr., had absolutely no trouble hurting people. Bella was a ruthless, snarky sociopath at best and a psychotic asshole at worst. Her brothers, however, were psychotic assholes ALL of the time. Bella was, by FAR, the most mentally stable of the three.

Not that you'd know it by looking at her. With her 3' 4" stature, caramel curls and her big blue eyes, she looked like the most innocent little girl you'd ever come across. Her brother had similar features, but Bilbo had brown eyes and Bungo had green ones.

Back to the point, though. Bella hated gunfire. That is, she hated it when other people were firing the guns. They hurt people. More specifically, her brothers. Just because they were a few minutes older than her didn't mean that they got to push her, the youngest triplet, around, or leave her out of their outings. You know, the ones that usually ended in gunfire?

"_Aule_, Bilbo, if you're going to insist on getting shot, will you at least get shot somewhere that doesn't bleed much?! You're tracking blood all over the bar." _Bag End_ was the well-regulated drinking establishment owned by the three of them. It was also the new favorite business place for the Hobbiton underground. Not that Bella complained. Money was useful, even if it was something the Baggins family had never actively sought out. She sighed and pulled out a roll of bandages and a bottle of rubbing alcohol from the counter. Bilbo's wound wasn't going to clean itself.

"Dammit, Bilbo, hold still, or it will just get worse. By Aule, I don't complain this much when _I_ get shot." Bilbo growled at his little sister.

"Maybe that's because you don't get your bullet wound jerked around by a prissy psychopath."

"…point taken. Now shut up, will you? I can't work while you're blubbering at me."

"You're never this rough with Bungo," Bilbo grumbled. Bella snorted in derision.

"You're right. I'm WORSE with Bungo."

A knock at the door sounded just as she finished wrapping the last of Bilbo's shoulder. Bella sighed. Probably another junkie, looking for the way to the market. She practically flung the door open in irritation

"We're closed today, so please find anothe-… Gandalf?" The old man smiled.

"Hello, my dear."

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	2. Chapter 2

(A/N): Hey! Say hello to a brand new chapter! This has some background on the Baggins triplets, and we finally meet Bungo! **Note: Bella's mother was half Japanese and half British, and her father was half Irish, a quarter Czech, and a quarter Russian. **That's why all of them have different eye colors, and why they speak Japanese and Czech in conjunction with English. The triplets are currently living in New Zealand. Also, I noticed that Hobbits are never heard speaking a language of their own, so I just decided that I should give them one, and my brain decided it should be Japanese, so there you go. In addition, their psychopathic tendencies aren't really going to shine through until they actually get into their first battle.

I own nothing. J.R.R Tolkein and Peter Jackson own all rights to the Hobbit and all it's characters. All I own are my OC's and the plot twists. Their beach, my sandcastle.

_Last time: _

_ "We're closed today, so you'll please find anothe-... Uncle Gandalf?" The old man smiled._

_ "Hello, my dear."_

_ "_Uncle Gandalf!" Bella practically threw herself at the man, and was swept up in a hug. "I haven't seen you in forever! How are you, old man? Come in, come in!"

Gandalf D. Gray was a very old family friend. He had been present for the birth of the triplets, was subsequently named their godfather, and was one of the closest confidants of Belladonna Baggins, their late mother. During Belladonna's life, they were thick as thieves, and that affection transfered over to her children upon their birth and her passing. Their late father, Bungo Baggins Sr., was also quite good friends with the old man until the end of his days, and passed four years after his wife.

Bella tugged him inside the dim building and sat him down in a chair. "Bilbo! Bungo! Uncle Gandalf's here!" There was a moment of silence, and then Bilbo and Bungo fairly tripped down the stairs and over each other to get to their godfather. Gandalf chuckled but gathered the two into his arms. The two were grinning like maniacs when they pulled back.

"Uncle Gandalf! We missed you," Bungo exclaimed. "Where have you been? How are you? Did you-" Bungo and Bilbo were jerked back abruptly.

"Let's give Uncle Gandalf some room, yeah? He just got here," Bella chuckled. Bungo was overenthusiastic at the worst of times. Her tone turned to ice, though she was still smiling pleasantly. "And Bilbo, you baka, what the hell do you think you're doing, ruining all the hard work I did to make sure you didn't bleed out through a hole in your shoulder?" Gandalf sent a sharp look at Bilbo.

"Young man, what have I told you about guns?" Bilbo suddenly decided that his sister's shoes were the single most interesting thing in the room. "Bilbo, just because you're turning 25 in two weeks does NOT mean that I won't take you over my knee!" Bilbo sighed.

"You said that guns were only worthwhile if I was doing the shooting, and that if I got shot it was my own damn fault and not to complain when Bella stitched me up because if I was stupid enough to let myself get hit by the bullet then I deserved to feel the pain." Gandalf nodded sharply, but he was pleased that the children had remembered his words.

"I trust I won't have to repeat myself then?" All of them shook their heads vehemently. "Good. Now, speaking of your birthday," All of their heads perked up. "I have decided to give you your presents early instead of late, because for the first time in 25 years, something unavoidable has come up, and I will not be able to attend the party." Bilbo and Bella looked horrified, and Bungo was visibly close to tears.

"But Uncle-" Gandalf held up a hand, silencing Bungo.

"Honestly, children, do you not think I would attend if I could?" Bella just sighed and hung her head.

"We know, Uncle, we know." He just chuckled and ruffled their hair.

"Very well, then." He reached into his bag. "I have something for each of you, and something for all three of you, as usual." He handed them each two perfectly wrapped boxes. Bungo tore the green paper off of his and gasped as he revealed a set of easily concealable daggers and a silver cuff bracelet studded with fire opals. Bilbo cheered as he unwrapped a collapsable double bladed staff and a silver cuff bracelet with turquoise. Bella sqealed with glee as she opened a mechanical retractable scythe (**A/N: Like Ruby's from RWBY, except black and white instead of black and red and smaller, to fit Bella's proportions)** and a silver bracelet that matched her brother's, except hers alternated between moonstone and onyx. They all tackled Gandalf in a giant hug.

"Thank you, Uncle Gandalf! We love them!" Gandalf laughed.

"I'm glad. Now, for your group present." He extracted one more parcel from his bag. "Hold out your hands." They each held out a flat hand side by side and he placed it on all three. He had used this when they were little to show that it was meant for all three of them, and never really grew out of it.

"A book?" Bella asked. "The... Hobbit. What's it about?" As all three of them looked at Gandalf, waiting for an answer, they didn't notice the soft white light that breifly enveloped the book and their hands.

Gandalf inwardly grinned. "You'll just have to read it and find out."

Bella and the boys spent the next two weeks just familiarizing themselves with their new weapons and they pretty much never took off their jewelry. They practiced in a large clearing in the woods behind Bag End. Bella and Bilbo were starting from scratch, but Bungo already worked with knives, so he had a significant advantage over them in their spars. Never the less, Bella and Bilbo learned quickly, and by the end of the 14th day had a new fighting style all their own.

** How was it? Good? Bad? Leave a review and tell me! The bracelets may have some significance later on, and you'll understand why I had all of them touch the book at the same time. Also, next chapter is a little bit of birthday party, and then Middle earth, and a note from Gandalf!**

**Also, thank you to:**

**WeStandHereUnited**

**axara2**

**For following this story! You get cookies.**

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**Chapters are going to get longer from here on out, I promise!**


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